10 Things Mums Need – Essentials for Successful Motherhood
Motherhood (or parenthood) is not easy. It comes more natural to some but all parents have tough days. When you look after your kids full time it can be even more difficult as you rarely get any time for yourself.
In this post I have collected 10 things that I think most mothers need to cope and be happy mamas! I know, not all mums drink lots of coffee and love wine — but many of us do!
This is a difficult one but when you spend a lot of time with unpredictable babies or cheeky toddlers who like to push you to the limit, you need patience. Lots of patience. I’m not a very patient person in general but try to be with our kids!
I need caffeine to get through the day after not getting a full night’s sleep for over two and a half years. Parenthood is exhausting and coffee is a must for me. The first two in the morning are the most important ones but the next 2-3 cups are very important too! I drink mine the Swedish way — very, very strong and very frequent. Others have tea or Coca Cola. Some survive without caffeine but I don’t understand how. Maybe they have kids that sleep and/or help with childcare? I have neither.
A glass or two of red wine after a tough day with the kids makes everything better again. Really difficult days might require something stronger, like gin. Some days, some chocolate is enough. Sometimes, both wine and chocolate is needed. You’ll see when you have a toddler.
Another important way to gather energy is to have a bit of time for yourself each day. Most mums who look after their kids full time do not get much me-time. It’s crucial to try and fit some in as it will make you a happier person and a happy mama equals happy children. I like to take 15 minutes in the evening to have a nice relaxing bath and read a book in the bath. It’s one of my favourite things to do and it means even more to me now. At the weekends I sometimes try to squeeze in a nap but my baby is usually with me then.
Even the most maternal of mums need a little break from full time motherhood sometimes. I don’t mean taking off for a week but something simple like a walk, a trip to the shops or meeting up for a coffee with a friend — without the kids. Just an hour or two will recharge you and make you enjoy your children more when you are reunited.
A massage is a great way to relax both physically and mentally and just 5-10 minutes can do so much for tense shoulders and neck ache from co-sleeping awkwardly with you baby, carrying your toddler or constant breastfeeding. A foot rub is amazing and can help release tension all over and are great for headaches too. Ask your partner to massage you and return the favour.
A Meal Out
This is something that I need every now and then. I need to enjoy a nice meal out that I’ve not had to plan, shop for or cook. I love going out with my husband and our children and it’s lovely not having to do anything else other than choose a dish from a menu. Maybe two if we’re having dessert too!
Mamas need a good support network of friends and family but the most important source of support is probably your partner. I need my husband to talk to about important decisions about the kids, to vent to when having a rough day and to hug at the end of the day.
Time With Partner
It’s vital to not forget about your relationship with your partner when you become parents and a lot of your focus is on the baby. Make sure you get some time together at night and try to go out together on your own sometimes too if you can. A baby video monitor is a great tool to ensure you can keep an eye on your baby sleeping but also enjoy some alone time together at home.
One On One Time
If you are a parent to more than one child, remember to carve out some one on one time with each child. This is significant for both you and your kids and will make your relationship stronger and help your children’s development as they get your full attention. I try to play with my toddler when my baby naps and I get alone time with my baby when my toddler goes to bed at night.
Do you agree? Is there anything missing that you find essential?